This is Article #2 in Single and Still Breathing: Subject SPIRITUAL: Plan of Happiness

 

Decisions Determine Destiny: 5 Positive Choices to Find Your “Happily Ever After”

 

Our “Happily Ever After” begins with the choices we make today. Daily we make decisions that determine our destiny, and with the gospel of Jesus Christ at our fingertips there is a clear path that we can take. If we have made poor choices in the past we can change them. Through the atonement we can be forgiven and move forward. We can press forward with faith in our Savior who saved us from our sins and created the path we can follow.

 

We have all made poor choices in the past and looking back with regret we may realize we have made a pothole in our road. We don’t dare go down that same road again fearing we will make another poor choice and sink or dig ourselves deeper. This can make our road dangerous to travel over and lead others to travel the same road and sink.

 

Here are 5 Positive Choices to Find Your Happily Ever After that will lead you down a road we were born to go down, the road less traveled, the road with bumps, yet a road that if we travel will make us stronger. It is a road we will want to share with our posterity someday, the road where we can partake of the fruit like in Lehi’s dream ” to make one happy” (1 Nephi 8:20). We will be tempted to stray from the path and go down that pothole road. Just remember that one positive choice is the result of hundreds of tiny positive thoughts. 

 

Let’s start off with a few quotes by President Monson’s in his talk DECISION DETERMINES DESTINY. He said, “It has been said by one, years ago, that history turns on small hinges, and so do people’s lives. Our lives will depend upon the decisions which we make—for decisions determine destiny.” We are in charge–as free agents we are here to determine our own destiny by choices–and yes we want that “Happily Ever After.” President Thomas S. Monson summed up what we must do as we endeavor to return home to our Heavenly Father: “Choose the right.”

 

President Thomas S. Monson starts us out on three important decisions that will definately help us create our “Happily Ever After”: “What are the three most important decisions? First, what will be my faith? Second, whom shall I marry? Third, what will be my life’s work?” Plus you will find  more important decisions as follows.

Let’s take the Prophet’s advice on how we can choose and make these three and five important decisions.

“All can have the guidance and direction of our Heavenly Father if we strive for it. I would encourage us to read and understand the ninth section of the Doctrine and Covenants. This is a section that is frequently overlooked but which has a lesson for all of us. When we contemplate making a significant decision, may I suggest we go to our Heavenly Father in the manner in which the Prophet Joseph indicated the Lord advised him. The Lord said to Oliver Cowdery through the Prophet Joseph in the ninth section” (of the Doctrine and Covenants):

“Behold, you have not understood; you have supposed that I would give it unto you, when you took no thought save it was to ask me.

But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.

But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong. (D&C 9:7–9.)”

With every decision, prayer can give us the answers we need so we can move forward with faith. In the book More Than the Tattooed Mormon, Ali Carraway said (on p. 64), “I cannot think of a greater feeling than the Lord’s approval of what you’re doing. His approval is so powerful it can trump every negative feeling you have.” 

 

CHOICE #1 What Will Be My Faith? 

“Will I have eye single to the glory of God?
Or, will I be double-minded.
Will I sit on the fence when it comes to faith?
Will my actions one minute be on the right side and the next minute be for the wrong?
– Thomas S. Monson

President Monson said, “First, what will be my faith? I feel that we should put our trust in our Heavenly Father, that each one should have the responsibility to find out for himself whether or not this gospel of Jesus Christ is true. As we read the Book of Mormon and the other standard works, as we put the teachings to the test, then we will know of the doctrine, for this is our promise; we will know whether it be of man or whether it be of God. Our quest can have far-reaching consequences.”

Let’s take upon ourselves this challenge to develop our faith to read the scriptures in faith. The Book of Mormon Promise in Moroni 10:4-5 (shown below) tells us how. Through study and prayer we can receive a witness based upon our faith.

SINGLES PLEASE COMMENT: What have you experienced while reading the Book of Mormon? How has it increased your faith? How has it made you want to be a better person? How has this helped your eye to be single to the glory of God?

CHOICE #2 Whom Shall I Marry? 

President Monson said, “Young people who are at that particular time in their lives have the responsibility to make similar decisions. They have the important responsibility to choose whom to marry—not only whom to date.

Elder Bruce R. McConkie said, ‘Nothing is more important than marrying the right person, at the right time, in the right place, and by the right authority.’ We hope you will avoid too quick courtships. It is important that each of you become acquainted with the person you plan to marry, that there is certainty that each of you is looking down the same pathway with the same eternal objectives in mind.”

“You’ll love the talk Whom Shall I Marry? by President Thomas S. Monson where he tells how he met his wife (see SOCIAL: Dating and Friendship article and statement below*). He said to “Become Well Acquainted. It is essential that you become well acquainted with the person whom you plan to marry so that you can make certain you are both looking down the same pathway, with the same objectives in mind. It is ever so significant that you do this.” He also said,

“Keep an Eternal Perspective. Make certain that the marriage in your future is a temple marriage. There is no scene so sweet, no time so sacred as that very special day of your marriage. Then and there you glimpse celestial joy. Be alert; do not permit temptation to rob you of this blessing.”

*• President Thomas S. Monson in his talk Decisions Determine Destiny told about seeing and meeting his future wife at a dance. He said, “I had a decision to make, and I thought to myself: ‘This decision requires courage. What should I do?’ I found in my heart an appreciation of that phrase, ‘When the time for decision arrives, the time for preparation is past.’ I squared my shoulders and plunged toward my opportunity. . . . That decision was one of the most important decisions that I have ever made. Young people who are at that particular time in their lives have the responsibility to make similar decisions. They have the important responsibility to choose whom to marry—not only whom to date.”

CHOICE #3 What will be My Life’s Work?

In his talk Life’s Obligations, President Gordon B. Hinckley said, “Choose a vocation where you will be happy. You will spend eight and more hours a day at it through all the foreseeable future. Choose something that you enjoy doing. Income is important, but you do not need to be a multimillionaire to be happy. In fact, you are more likely to be unhappy if wealth becomes your only objective. You will become a slave to it. It will color all your decisions. You need enough to get along on. You need enough to provide well for your family. It will be better if the husband becomes the provider and the wife does not work when children come. That situation may be necessary in some cases, but if you choose wisely now, it is not likely to become a requirement.

MORE OF GORDON B. HINCKLEY’S IDEAS:

• Choose a field in which you can grow. You need the stimulation of new effort and new ambitions, of new discoveries and new challenges.

• Get all the schooling you can to qualify yourselves in your chosen vocations. In this world, competition is terrible. It eats up people. It destroys many. But it must be faced; it is something with which we have to deal.

• Choose something that will be stimulating and thought-provoking and that will carry with it the day-to-day opportunity to do something to improve the society of which you will become a part.

• These are the great days of your preparation for your future work. Do not waste them. Take advantage of them. Cram your heads full of knowledge. Assimilate it. Think about it. Let it become a part of you.

• But with all of this, in choosing a vocation you should bear in mind that there are other things in life that are of tremendous importance also. The greatest task of all, the greatest challenge, and the greatest satisfaction lie in the rearing of a good family. There must also be time for service in the Church. Otherwise these very important dimensions of your life will be relegated to a back burner.

• Life has a way of moving us in our vocational work from one thing to another. This likely will happen more in the future. The education you receive can become a solid foundation on which to build a career that may cover many fields of endeavor.” – Gordon B. Hinckley

More Ideas:

• I like the ideas here with this article: Idea List: A Major Decision (hints to help you choose what is right for you) . . . READ MORE 

• Find Employment. Start at LDS Employment . . . READ MORE

• Receive Job Alerts. I like job alerts that come to my email – Indeed.com (indeed job alert) . . . READ MORE

 

CHOICE #4 Will I Choose Liberty and Eternal Life?

“Obedience to God’s law will bring liberty and eternal life, whereas disobedience will bring captivity and death.” – Thomas S. Monson
(2 Nephi 2:27 – We are free “to act for [our]selves and not to be acted upon.” We are “free to choose liberty and eternal life … or to choose captivity and death.”)

 

Fence sitters don’t get anywhere; they may be good one minute and bad the next, but where does that them? Does it build strength and stamina to be wishy-washy; never really knowing what your standards are? No. William James, American philosopher and psychologist said, “A chain is no stronger than its weakest link, and life is after all a chain.” What does that mean? Where does our strength come from?

 

I knew a girl in high school who came to our singles ward (to meet guys); yet the guys she met there were really not her style as she went for the bad boys. She said one day, “It’s okay to do what I’m doing; I can always repent later after my wild stage is over.” My other friend commented later about her statement. He said, “She clearly doesn’t understand the atonement.” I have thought about this. If we truly love our Savior, then we would not want to do bad things (because we don’t want to make Him suffer–even though it was in the past–His suffering was for us now actions).

 

We would choose liberty (to be free from guilt) and eternal life (live with God again; “they can in nowise inherit the kingdom of God, for no unclean thing can dwell there, or dwell in his presence” Moses 6:57).

 

I had another close friend who slipped up, sinned and never felt she was forgiven. Apparently she didn’t really trust in and believe that the Savior loved her enough to suffer for her and give His life for her making it possible for her to be forgiven. By her not forgiving herself and trusting in God’s power to remove the sin, it was easier to do that same sin again. There is such a fine line between obedience and disobedience. Which will we choose? Just remember, not to judge, for no one is perfect except our Savior and He is the perfect example for us to follow and was the perfect one to atone for our sins.

 

Where will this decision lead us? It is so critical to really “believe” Jesus and trust in Him and what He did for us. A good book to read about this is Believing Christ: The Parable of the Bicycle and Other Good News by Stephen E. Robinson. He explains it in such a way that you really do believe that Christ loves you and made the sacrifice for you individually. 

 

President Ezra Taft Benson said, “When obedience ceases to be an irritant and becomes our quest, in that moment God will endow us with power.” 

At EFY (Especially For Youth) one year we were asked to obey the law of chastity and that steady dating could put us in danger of losing our virtue. The speaker asked us to go call whomever we were dating steadily at the time and break up. I saw right after 15 or more youth lined up at the pay phone to make the call. I was really happy that day that I didn’t feel pressured to be in a serious relationship with someone and have the temptations in front of me. I was only in high school; no pressure to date or find my mate; I was too young then and was able to focus on gaining a testimony and other important things like serving my family, and getting an education. Even though I went on a few dates, I was comfortable and felt at peace.

 

Is it easier to not be obedient, or easier to be obedient? If you are used to being obedient you feel the peace that comes following God’s laws. After all Heavenly Father’s plan of happiness is to make us happy right? He wants us to put off the “natural man” as it is an “enemy to God” (Mosiah 3:19.) It’s our choice. My grandmother Stella used to say, “If you are not up on something; you’re down on it.” I have often thought that related to obeying God’s laws.

 

Testimony seems to be the key factor for obedience–staying on the path. My mother gained her testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ by reading the Book of Mormon and by living one gospel principle at a time and praying about it. This is when she knew the gospel was true and that it is an easy way of life, once you are on the path. In the LDS Living Magazine July/August 2016 we learn of the testimony of Kresimir Cosic a BYU basketball player and world famous athlete who joined the church about his testimony. He said, “There are a hundred reasons why I should not join the Church, and only one reason why I should–because it is true.”

 

So, if you do not yet have a testimony, or you are off the path, read about Lehi’s Dream (1 Nephi 8) and increase your desire to hold onto the rod of iron (which is the word of God found in the scriptures) and live the principles and hold on. You can make it! Obedience is a principle you can easily turn to that will bring you happiness. Take one obedience step at a time and read one verse of scripture at a time. Challenge yourself to make the journey. It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it. The advantages are endless and from this Tree of Life scriptures to ponder your path, you will discover that tasting the fruit of the gospel is worth the effort. Ponder these scriptures as you “ponder the path of thy feet.” This way you will feel free.

 

So where does your happiness lie? Ask yourself, “Will I choose captivity and death or liberty and eternal life? (2 Nephi 2:27)

 

CHOICE #5 What Talents and Gifts Will I Develop?

“Heavenly Father has given you spiritual gifts and talents to help you become who He would have you become.”
– Elder Mervyn B. Arnold – Talk: “Where Am I? How to Discover and Develop Your Spiritual Gifts and Talents”

 

In the Parable of the Talents (Matthew 25:14-30) Jesus told of a man who gave servants talents (money). He that received 5 talents made 5 more, and 2 talents gained other 2. He who received 1 talent digged into the earth and hid his money. Those who used them were given more. We too can learn from this story that as we use our talents they will be increased and was taken into “the joy of the lord” and “ruler over many things.” The one who was afraid hid his talents and the Lord called him “a wicked and unprofitable servant” and was cast out into outer darkness.

 

 

We can develop our talents as Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has taught how trials can shape us: “Just when all seems to be going right, challenges often come in multiple doses applied simultaneously. When those trials are not consequences of your disobedience, they are evidence that the Lord feels you are prepared to grow more (see Proverbs 3:11–12).

 

He therefore gives you experiences that stimulate growth, understanding, and compassion [two very important gifts] which polish you for your everlasting benefit. To get you from where you are to where He wants you to be requires a lot of stretching, and that generally entails discomfort and pain.” – “Trust in the Lord,” Ensign, Nov. 1995

 

There is an article – a must read: How to Discover Your Gifts, By Justina Lichner where she describes eight ideas to help you discover some of your not-so-obvious gifts. Here you will discover these:
1. Ask others to let you know.
2. Look for gifts in adversity.
3. Pray for the help to recognize your gifts.
4. Don’t be afraid to branch out.
5. Search the word of God.
6. Look outside yourself.
7. Think about people you look up to.
8. Reflect on your family. 

 

So without hesitation, ask yourself: “Which talents and gifts should I develop?”

 

In Summary:  Decisions Determine Destiny in the three stages of living out our “Happinly Ever After.”
1. Our First Estate–Where We Came From: We lived in heaven with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and chose to follow God’s plan to come to earth to receive a body and work out our salvation so we can return to live with Heavenly Father and Jesus again.

2. Our Second Estate. Once we have found the gospel of Jesus Christ, we have a pattern of living, a road to go down to achieve our ultimate destiny. The decisions we make will determine this . . .

3. Our Third Estate where we will live after this life, hopefully the celestial kingdom–our ultimate goal to live with heavenly father and Jesus and our loved ones. This is what Heavenly Father’s Plan of Salvation is all about – or also called the God’s Plan of Happiness. 

 

Three Degrees of Glory – USE THIS LINK TO VIEW FROM YOUR I-PHONE
Elder Dallin H. Oaks explains that the three different degrees of glory have a special relationship to the three different members of the Godhead. (2:29)